Let’s face it: Mother’s Day can bring out a myriad of emotions.

For some of us, we’re remembering a mom who is no longer walking the earth with us.

For others, we mourn a relationship that wasn’t quite what we wanted or even needed.

For some, it’s child loss–through death, miscarriage, or some other situation.

Still others grapple with infertility and the strange questions that come with being of a certain age and motherless.

And a shout out to the women who’ve chosen NOT to be mothers although this society seems to scream: be a mother! (how are we different than ancient Biblical times where women were measured by the number of children they bore! To this day, the word “barren” makes me cringe.)

So now that we’ve gotten over the shouts of “Happy Mother’s Day” from strangers–let’s turn to another important day in this month–really it’s all month. That’s Mental Wellness.

Before I even knew this term, I had marked May as my special care month. It’s when I remember with great detail the day my family gathered in a hospital and kissed my mother good-bye; it’s also Mother’s Day month and my mother’s birthday comes at the end of the month. She had always proclaimed May as her month. So for the past 19 years, I’ve proclaimed it as the month of especially remembering her–and missing her. So I need extra car for myself in May.

What do you do when you need extra care? Push through? Beat yourself into submission?

I have new traditions: I speak to my friends more; I enjoy my favorite foods (I’ve had crab legs twice!) I do a special Zumba class and try to walk more. These are all ways I care for myself.

And I’m dedicating the rest of this month to sharing ways you too can Navigate the Blues (the title of my latest book) and care for yourself.

What’s on your self-care list?

What do you do when you need extra care? Push through? Beat yourself into submission?